Keith grabbed Debra’s arms, pushed them above her head and pinned her against the kitchen wall. He got in her face and yelled, “I hate your hair tramp, do something about it!”
Debra fell to the ground in fear, shaking as he walked out of the room slamming the door behind him. It was different this time. He had never used physical force to criticize or degrade her before. She was devastated and did all she could to keep her boys from seeing her in this state. She was sure they heard him screaming at her, nothing out of the ordinary in their house. To let her boys see her this way…well… she just couldn’t let that happen.
Emotionally abused by Keith for many years, Debra had been thinking lately, she needed to do something about the constant criticism, yelling, belittling, degrading and never ending put downs OR her boys were going to treat the girls in their lives the same way their dad treated her.
She always thought about it but never did anything to make changes or set boundaries with Keith, thinking things would get better. But it never did, each time it got worse. She sat on the ground holding back tears wondering how she could have ever let it get this far. Over the course of years, she knew Keith had managed to devalue her, reduce her self-esteem to nearly nothing and took way any confidence she had as her heart hardened to the constant criticism and name calling.
Debra knew deep down inside she had been beaten down emotionally and verbally and was losing the part of herself she longed to have back. She used to be an outgoing, confident and assertive person, and she really missed that part of her. But things were different now because, she no longer had a voice or boundaries in her relationship with Keith. Debra wanted to find that voice again…along with her true value and self esteem… fast!
Tonight Keith had crossed the line. Now that the boys were involved (or at least seeing what was going on) she felt she had to take action, she had to do something about it that night. Because, the next time may not be just criticism and pinning up against walls.
Emotional abuse is a precursor to physical abuse, that’s why it is important to stop it before is escalates into something even more harmful, especially in romantic relationships, where it tends to be more prevalent. You have been wounded enough, you don’t need the physical wounds on top of the emotional suffering. You have been hurt and wounded verbally…which has been devastating to your self esteem.
The scars in emotional abuse are very deep and can last a lifetime. Does your relationship have any of the 15 warning signs of emotional abuse? To determine if you are in an emotionally abusive relationship and learn more about these warning signs… click here xxxxx “15 Warning Signs of Emotional Abuse.” If you answered YES and no longer want to be the victim of emotional and verbal abuse, the cycle of abuse will need to be broken and the relationship needs to change.
Whether it’s with a partner, spouse, kid, boss, there are steps you can take to initiate the change. Anytime you feel you are in a threatening situation where you may be physically harmed or injured…it is best to seek professional help, so you can be completely guided through the process. I am here for you ladies!
Because not all women want to leave their abusive relationship….If you are in an emotionally abusive relationship and want to try and make the relationship work… click here xxxxxlink for “10 steps to Being Happy in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship.”
If you want to end the cycle of abuse…click herexxxxx. You are important, you matter, you deserve to live a life free from abuse…do something about it today…FOR YOURSELF!!!!
Have you decided to stay in an emotionally abusive relationship? Do you have a plan? We would love to learn from you, please share your story!
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