Challenged By Teenage Communication? 10 Tips to Keeping Communication Alive!

ARE YOU TRYING EVERYTHING YOU CAN TO KEEP COMMUNICATION GOING WITH YOUR TEEN…and nothing seems to be working? YOU, the parent, are not alone…trust me, there are thousands of parents in this same exact situation! As a parent of a teenage you may find yourself exhausted, frustrated and worn down… to a point you have nothing left to give to your teen, or to anyone for that matter! You may be thinking of throwing your hands up in the air and saying “OK, I give up…there is nothing more I can do!” Maybe you have already done this!   You tell yourself you tried and did your best, but the relationship you once had with our teenager is now over…it will never be the same again. The end!

DEAR PARENT, this is what you need to know! IF YOU HAVE REACHED THIS FRUSTRATING POINT, COMMUNICATION WITH YOUR TEEN HAS NEVER BEEN MORE IMPORTANT THAN IT IS RIGHT NOW!

Some points of hope to think about…

• This is a crucial time for both you and your teen! It is so important to make every effort and attempt possible to keep communication going with your teen…even if you don’t want to! Why is it important to do this? Because, if we continue to try, there is still hope for a wonderful relationship with your teen! If we stop trying, they stop trying…and the relationship is going to spiral downwards…and I know you do not want that to happen, you have worked too hard!
• No matter how tough life gets with your teen, if you cut off communication with them, you are cutting your teens most important life line… YOU…their parent!
• As parents, it is our duty, to keep communication going, even if it’s one way communication right now! In time it will get better no matter how tough it is right now!
• Always remember…the alternative to having a relationship with our teen, (no matter how challenging, ugly and difficult it might be) is to have NO relationship with them! None of us as parents want this alternative…ever! You want a relationship with your teen that is going to be not just tolerable…but fulfilling as well…and it is possible!
• Here’s the good news…YOU do have a choice in how you communicate with your teen! If the way you communicate with them today is not working, try to figure out a new, improved, different and creative way of communicating with them. Deep down inside…you teen, kids and perhaps even your young adult child, WANTS you to communicate with them, even if they flat out say they don’t!
• You can do nothing about your communication issue and just try to ignore it, and the relationship will stay the same…communication will not get better between you two.
• OR you can change the way you communicate and function in the relationship…which will change the relationship you have with your teen! It’s a choice you have to make for the sake of the relationship.

Whatever life is throwing your way during these challenging teenage years, Do not give up on your precious teen…not ever! You, the parent, are the mature one in the situation and to give up and cut off communication with your teen, no matter how rebellious, destructive and horrible they have been…well… is not a productive solution to the problem for either of you! Continuing to communicate with your teen will bring rewards to the relationship, in time!

Here are 10 proven tips on keeping the communication alive with your teen…and they really do work!

1. Learn when to speak and when you should remain silent.
2. Carpools are awesome; it is your opportunity to learn more about your teen.
3. Never over react to something they say, stay calm and respond at a later time when both of you are calm.
4. Teens do not want you to fix them; they want your empathetic ear.
5. Always be available when your teen wants to talk. Put down your cell phone, turn off the TV and give them your full attention, they deserve it.
6. Do not expect them to tell you everything they tell their friends. Teens value privacy.
7. Always be honest with your teen.
8. Love them even when they are unlovable…it will pay off in the end!
9. If they don’t want to communicate verbally, try writing notes or sending e-mails, texts…anything to keep communication alive!
10. Always start your conversation with positive words of affirmation, validating them, then what you have to say will be easier for your teen to hear!

As hard as it is right now, especially if you are not feeling respected by your teen, the time and effort you put into communicating with your teen will pay off! You will make it through this tough stage and come out a stronger, more loving, more forgiving, more content, more fulfilled parent…I sure did! Nobody ever said being a parent of a teen was going to be easy, because it’s not!   But I am so glad I made the choice to keep the communication going with my teens, even during the turbulent times…and you will be to!

Are you being challenged when it comes to communication with your teen? What have you tried that works and doesn’t work?