WHAT IS A “PERFECT” relationship? Do they even exist? If you have ever seen a perfect relationship…please let me know… because, after all these years in coaching, I haven’t run into anyone who has had one! Why…because we are human…we ourselves are not perfect!   Let me throw in another little twist… a “perfect” relationship, to me, may not be so “perfect” to you! We are looking for different things in a relationship…perfection boils down to personal opinion! So instead of perfection, let’s talk about what a “HEALTHY” relationship might look like.

I came across a study done by some wellness experts who claim a healthy relationship must have four key ingredients as it’s anchor or foundation in order to be considered “healthy.” I love this simple analogy!

“Building a healthy relationship is much like building a house. There are elements such as HONESTY, TRUST, RESPECT and COMMUNICATION that form the foundation. You have to actively want these building blocks and you can evaluate your relationship by looking for these key ingredients. This takes work!

If any of these qualities are missing from your relationship, talk openly with your partner about your concerns and needs. It takes both partners working together to make the relationship a healthy one.

If one person is over functioning in a relationship, the other is under functioning, and this does not create a balanced, solid foundation.

Most importantly, you need to believe that YOU deserve respect, honesty, trust and positive communication, and that you will not “settle” for a relationship that does not have these building blocks!”

Don’t you think our relationships are like a fine piece of artwork… these building blocks are all interwoven, working in unison, depending on each other. Without one of these key ingredients, the relationship is not healthy. It’s never too late to make adjustments in your foundation! Our relationships are a work in progress, meaning we are working and making adjustments, all the time…I know I am!

So protect your relationships with regular inspections! Those who are frequently checking their key building blocks and making the necessary adjustments, often have less work to do in the long run!  This is how you can maintain healthy relationships! And always remember the importance of “believing” you deserve respect, honesty, trust and positive communication…don’t settle for anything less…because if you believe you will receive!

Take a minute to inspect the foundations on your closest relationships. Are all four in good condition?

  1. HONESTY    
  2. TRUST      
  3. RESPECT  
  4. COMMUNICATION

Are there any other key “building blocks” you would add to the “foundation?” Which one is most important to you?

About the Author Lorrie Millet

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